E.L.O. Limericks!

 

E.L.O. Limericks!

Just for fun, here are a collection of ELO limericks that I've collected. If you have some to add to the list, write me and I'll put 'em up. Also, let me know if you'd like your name attached, otherwise I'll leave it off.


There once was a musician named Jeff
At crafting a tune he was deft
Tried playing a song
But got it all wrong
When he strummed with his hand on the left
There once was a man named Jeff Lynne
Who left fans wondering where he has been
For that music of his
Would he launch elo.biz?
Or will he delay it again and again?
There once was a band called ELO
Into the studio they often would go
Many songs they would do
Singing out the word "blue"
Because nothing they could rhyme with "yellow"
There was this album called Zoom
Recorded in Jeffs living room
Some stooped so low
Saying "this is solo"
Where's Kelly Bev Mik and Hugh?
   by Tony Bonnici
There once was a band called ELO,
Two members of which played the cello.
Both hard rocking and sweet,
They brought the crowds to their feet,
And the cheers made the stadiums echo!
   by Yvette Pourciau
There once was a man named Rob Caiger
He's a big ELO fan, I'd wager
He'll give fans a tune
We hope very soon
Maybe a remix of "Illusions in G Major"
Roy leaving it could have meant doom
Jeff's ELO rose from the tomb
In he brought Tandy
And wow was he handy
He even played keyboards on Zoom!
   by Daryl Treger
"Does ELO really exist?",
Was the question that came from the List.
Guess it came down to dares:
"It's Jeff Lynne, so who cares?"
But some eskimos get pretty pissed!
   by Daryl Treger
There once was a muso named Jeff
Who with many instruments was deft
Is he Jeff or ELO?
Be damned if I know
But the drums weren't as good when Bev left!
   by Virginia
What most ELO fans truly did fear,
Was that their next release wasn't too near,
But all was not bad,
A misunderstanding was had,
'Cause their next CD is named "Later This Year"
There once was a fellow named Lynne
Who’s none production of music, likened to sin
His latest “Into the Orange”
Which was not very successful from both a personal and financial aspect
Like this limerick ended up in the bin.
There once was a fellow named Hugh
Who said, "I'm really not sure what to do.
I'm a very nice fellow
who plays rock 'n' roll cello.
I lost my job after Out of the Blue!"
When ELO strike up a tune,
The song seems to end much too soon,
They've been crafted so fine,
Give me chills up my spine,
Hope the re-masters are out by June.
   by Al Findlay
A man named Jeff Lynne played guitar
And with a few bands, went quite far.
Added moog and some string.
Lots of voices to sing.
And Crikey! It made him a star.
   by Al Findlay
Clayton Wilbury started to strum
As Nelson was starting to hum
They'd accomplished their task
What was that? I soon asked.
Write ten songs in an hour chewing gum.
   by Al Findlay
A musician born in Shard End
said: why do I always have to defend
my music against jerks
who can't apreciate works
of someone with a wig on his head
A bandleader hiding in LA
wanted always to have the last say
So he put on his glasses
said stick your violins up your ...
who´s writing the songs anyway?
There was a musician would-o'-been
Who changed her middle name to Lynne
After marriage for years
And two kids, it was clear,
"Never mind-- I'll just never be him!"
   by Terry (ex-Lynne) D.
Jeff Lynne uses the words
rain and tears
and sometimes pain and fears
It came out of the blue
is that really true
   by Lynnette Johansson
There once was a Guy named Jeff Lynne
Bye gum he could bloody well sing
The drums were just heaven
When he signed up Bev Bevan
and Louie took care of the strings
A Nightrider called Jeffrey from Brum,
Writes great songs that we all sing and hum;
He plays piano and bass,
And on guitar is an ace,
But could use lessons from Ringo on drums!
   by John Bishop
There was a Brum on the run,
for California and a little more sun,
he left in his wake,
all his fans for goodness sake,
where's this new album you said you would make?
An Orchestra Jeff Lynne once led
Filled my ears as I lay on my bed,
Those strings, oh so sweet!
And that rhythm and beat!
Now I can't get it out of my head.
There was a band called ELO,
Whose songs will, wherever you go,
Bring smiles to faces,
And dancing in places,
As guitar makes love to cello.
When you speak with Jeff Lynne you must never,
In discussing his greatest endeavour,
Never dare, I implore you,
If you know what's good for you,
Ever dare bring up "Beatles Forever"!
For an ELO album called Zoom,
Jeff Lynne filled a studio room
With musicians he hired
(Not the old band he'd fired),
And concert sales failed to boom.
A remade "Roll Over Beethoven"
Caused drool like the dogs of Pavlov. In
Just a few years
The lads played to cheers
This "Orchestral Rock" thing was Move-in.
   by Michael Lucas
We're fed up of all this waiting,
It's becoming so aggrevating,
With the music complete,
It would really be neat,
To hear it and start celebrating.
Jeff Lynne loves that knob twiddlin'
Just trying to get more fiddle in
Do 'em quick, do 'em good
It's well understood
He won't settle for fair to middlin'
There once was a bloke named Jeff Lynne,
Whose fans were always a-grin.
They waited forever,
For Jeff, who's quite clever,
To write a great opus again.
   by Dan Kleinman
A bearded hit writing machine
Has new songs which no-one has seen
We can't take the hiatus
Greatest Hits won't sedate us
Producing perfection can sure seem mean
   by Mike Cross
There was once a lazy Boy blue
A time that Reminds me of You
But then Ma Ma Belle
Evil Woman from Hell
Had a Showdown right Out of the Blue.
   by John Bosley
Add Your Limerick Here!
Add Your Limerick Here!

Got a new limerick you want to share? Contact me HERE with your limerick and I'll add it to this page!